Sunday, April 4, 2010

It's my first time blogging...

Hi there everyone, this may be the first time I blog, but there's more to it than just writing. I used to write diaries..I've got loads of them but then i don't know where they've gone to...Ever since we lived in Laos I started to write my thoughts on paper, it relaxes me a little. I get to be myself, I get to express myself without interference...that's what I like about writing, NO ONE INTERFERES!!! yeah sorry bout that but i had to. I've had problems, loads of them...maybe that's why I decided to make myself a blog...because that way I won't have to loose my diaries again. Hopefully i can share my thoughts with the world. I may look like I'm perfect...I may look like I'm happy...however...beneath these Asian skin I have...people have no idea what I've been through. I keep smiles on my face thinking that would make the world better, even though I wasn't. I smile because I know it's the most effective heal ever. I cannot make the world right by myself, I cannot turn people's mood swing just by telling them that I understand........that is why, I smile.

Let me introduce myself, my name is Hamizah and I was born on the 25th of August 1991. I'm a pure Malaysian, I was born in Malaysia. I have 6 siblings, all the others are boys. I have 2 elder brothers and 3 younger brothers. All of them I've had fights with, I guess that's how I get my tomboyish personality, but that doesn't mean I don't have feelings for boys. I do. Like any normal girls at the age of 3 to 10, we hate boys....they have cooties. But then you've had hormonal changes, then you started to realize that boys aren't such bad creatures after all...maybe my brothers aren't such great influences but they keep me company. Even though they did, I still feel lonely...I don't feel like anyone understands me, not even my mom. My dad on the contrary tries to, but I guess a dad's understanding wouldn't make any difference because I still can't talk to him about my hormonal changes and boy problems. I never tell my family anything, because I know they would judge me...so I play along. Therefore I, Hamizah, would like to announce that this blog is created as my personal diary..open to the public and even the whole world. I know sharing is caring but still...privacy remains private. I just want to let others who were born the same way I am might understand why I'd write such stuff.
xoxo,
Hami.

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